There is hope

Whatever troubles you may be having right now, believe with all your heart that the Lord will fill your life with abundant love and blessings.

In the midst of your life's turmoil, come home to the peace of certainty. Certainty that the difficult road will soon be over and a new grace will touch your life.

Easter Day is God's way of telling us that there is hope in every problem. The Lord will shine above darkness and will bring us relief and healing.

Happy Easter to everyone!

I feel sick already!

Last weekend, my dad announced at dinner, "Pack up your things kids! We'll go to Baguio!".

While the whole family is thrilled and excited for this trip, I don't feel a pressing desire to travel to the mountains again.

I mean, I love meeting new people and exploring our country but I guess I'm just naturally prone to motion sickness. Sea sickness. Car sickness. Air sickness. Elevator Sickness. Amusement Ride Sickness.

Sigh.

Whatever they call it, I have it and I hate it.

Just the mere thought of going to Baguio makes me dizzy and nauseous already. No kidding!

As a child, I couldn't remember any Baguio trip without me doing the technicolor yawn. My family tried a couple of things to help me ease the pain. Granny usually rub a drop of eucalyptus oil under my tiny nose. Mom suggested I look outside the window and breathe the fresh air. Dad preferred that I just sleep. All of which, I tried politely but still the inevitable for me happens. So after some time, they were all raising the white flag in my battle with motion sickness and decided to just bring plastic bags or brown bags for my "throw up time".

It starts with a headache, then a queasy stomach. Soon I'd turn green and clammy. The worst part is that even after vomiting, I still feel unwell and miserable.

My US trip in 2005 was around 20 hours. So yes, I was throwing up for the entire trip - 20 hours. Beat that! My bosses were taking me to the nearest hospital the moment they saw how terrible I look in Jacksonville airport. I assured them I just need a quiet, comfortable room where I can rest for a while.

I was reminiscing these horrible travel stories with Gilbert last night. He was laughing hysterically at first and later on, told me it's merely a childhood fear and that I have to overcome it.

I'm still undecided if I'll travel to Baguio with my family tomorrow. But what I'm sure is that I'll be missing out a lot of fun just because I worry about being sick.

The Lord lays His head

I'm reading the book, Dessert for the Angels. It's a compilation of stories and anecdotes guaranteed to rib-tickle your soul with its spiritual lessons. One short dialogue below kept resonating in my mind.

---

During a night of terrible temptation, a man prayed to the Lord.

"Please, Lord, help me," he whispered.

A voice from within replied, "Do not be afraid, I am already within you. In fact, my head is lying on your heart."

"But if your head does lie on my heart," the man questioned, "how come there is pain still?"

"You might have forgotten, son," the voice retorted, "I wear a crown of thorns on my head."

Sweet Suggestions for February

Love is still in the air! Here are eight ways you can show your man how he rocks your world. Some are taken from books or articles that I've read. The other suggestions are just from my mind - yet to be fulfilled.

1. At bedtime, put some lotion on his feet to moisturize them during these cold times.

2. Celebrate the chilly nights with an ice kiss. How? Melt an ice cube in your mouth until your mouth becomes cold and then plant a kiss that will give him chills!

3. This Valentine's Day, let him mess up your clean kitchen by cooking his special gourmet thing.

4. Dab a tiny drop of your perfume on his handkerchief or collar. He'll think of you the whole day.

5. Snuggle up to him while sipping that hot chocolate or watching the sad-ending movie.

6. Learn how to whisper in his ear with your mouth open.

7. Dig through his baby pictures and frame his funny or witty poses.

8. Conduct a careful study of his erogenous zones and make use of your knowledge.

Touching God

During a speaking activity in one of my training class, a quiet, bashful lady stood up and answered the question, "If you could take away something from someone, what would it be?"

The first two minutes of her reply was plain and sometimes humorous as she talked about her best friend. The last minute of her answer was a bit different. She suddenly turned emotional and her face red. There was a moment of silence inside the room. She chastely shared the ailing condition of her best friend's mother. I remember it vividly when she cried, "I want to take away her mom's illness. I want to help my friend but I don't have enough money. All I can do is pray for her mother."

I waited for the right time within the day and when I had it, I came closer to her and whispered, "You're doing your friend and her mother a really, really big favor." She gave me a confused look so I continued, "Prayer is the most powerful and most precious gift you can give someone. You don't have to say that all you can do is pray. Instead, you can tell her that you will continue to pray for her mother's recovery. That is a very big help, more than you can imagine." I embraced her tightly and she cried even more.

This is the exact message of the author Dr Harold J. Sala in his book, "Touching God: Guidelines for Personal Prayer".


Praying for someone is being selfless. It means you are enthusiastic to prioritize the needs of others than your personal interests. This book talks about the awesome power of prayer which is often neglected and under-utilized. It reveals about how the conversation should just flow out of our heart. The daily reflections deepen our spiritual roots as it increase our faith. Some of the chapters are Praying without an agenda, Praying as a couple, If God doesn't answer your prayer, What's on your prayer list?, When you pray, Forgive and so on.

Gilbert and I started reading it last week, just before we sleep. Every page is indeed very inspiring and life-changing.

May you also be blessed and touch God's heart through prayers.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Those sweet bunch of fresh flowers would surely melt a lady's heart on V day.

Make me an exception.

Well, okay, I lied. I like flowers but a single white rose is enough to make me smile. Watching the late night news, I can't imagine how a dozen of roses could cost up to a thousand pesos. With today's global crisis, it's not really practical to use all that money for flowers.

Gilbert knows me too well I guess. He spent the last few days making me my Valentine's Gift - a gorgeous, sturdy kitchen rack. I've been telling him how I like to enhance our kitchen space for my everyday cooking. He bought the steel from a junk shop, repainted and cut it equally. The thick wood and high pressure laminates (HPL) were purchased from the newly opened Wilcon Builders in Dau, Pampanga.

almost done

All kitchen clutter is now gone!

I didn't get any teddy bear, balloon, flowers nor chocolates for V Day. We didn't dine in an overpriced restaurant along with everyone else in the world. And it's perfectly fine.

Gilbert and I enjoyed the company of our families instead with a home-made dinner. No traffic jam, no horrific crowd. Just tons of laughter and stories. Having all of them in my life means more to me than anything else.

Oh and by the way...

I also got this La Senza sheer luxe mesh from my Valentine date. I was totally surprised and I love it!

Thanks sweetie! Happy Hearts' Day to everyone!

one month after...

Have you ever been repelled by the dust, bits of food and muck that fly out when shaking your keyboard upside down? For the longest time, I felt like an overused keyboard with all the gunk inside. I know I had to rearrange my life.

Seeing me unhappy and burned out with my job several months ago, Gilbert urged me to quit, remove all worries and just allow him to love me.

And I did.

How can I refuse his sincere eyes, gentle voice and unselfish request?

So one month ago, with a great amount of boldness and energy, I resigned.

Today, one month after, how I wish I made the decision sooner.

I got what I needed - more time with my family, stress-free life, luxury of time, spiritual nourishment, cleaner home, home cooked meals, a sound mind and a sound body. I let go of all my apprehensions about work benefits, regular pay checks and financial matters. Those are not my responsibilities anyway. Those are Gilbert's responsibilities. I'm allowing him to be in-charge. I'm letting him love me.

Bed Weather

January and February of each year are usually the cold months in the Philippines. But there's something different with the weather this year. I grew up in the Philippines and I've never felt this cool breeze of air in our city before. The 17°C temperature is also consistent throughout the past days and nights. We're like living in Baguio City which is the coldest place in the country. (According to the news, the temperature in Baguio is almost 07°C today.) These exceptional colder days bring out my hibernating mode... and I'm not enjoying it.

My faithful alarm wakes me up at seven in the morning but these January winds and weak light are pulling me back beneath the sheets. This somber weather also frustrates my sports minded and physically active hubby. Gilbert has tendencies to hit the couch any moment too but I'm trying to motivate him in sticking with his exercise routine.

Close friends can affirm how much I prefer warm, sunny days with the blue sky, or fruit shakes and barbeque beside the beach. But I guess, I need to live up to it especially now they're saying that the earth is on the brink of Ice Age. Whoa! Let's prepare for that, just in case. (Source: http://english.pravda.ru/science/earth/106922-0/)

I was thinking of ways on how I can stay fit and at the same time, be more creative at home when the weather is this gloomy. So here goes my list:

1. Make myself busy - First thing that came to my mind is to do my household chores. I'm hitting two birds with one stone. Oooppss, make that three! Our little home is cleaner than ever. I have a fit and toned body through stretching. I'm being productive despite this chilly weather. Yippie! I started to clear off a section in our already too cluttered closet for our cold gear - jackets, scarfs, and thick socks.

2. Drink water - EVEN IF I am not thirsty. Remember that a person can be dehydrated in the cold as in the summer season. 8 to 10 glasses of water everyday is still advisable. Besides, it'll keep myself internally moisturized and prevent dry skin.

3. Care for my skin - When temperatures drop, it also zap the moisture on our skin. I replenish it by using mild soap to clean my face every morning and before I sleep. I also exfoliate and scrub my skin before showering at least once a week. And lastly, moisturize using a lotion everyday with a natural ingredient. Organic is better.

TIP: You can apply lotion on your feet at night and cover them with cotton socks to keep them moisturized. Believe it or not, I got this idea from my brother. He's a bit vain.

4. Exercise for my heart - At the end of the day, I'll enjoy the cold, quiet moment with the person I love. We'll drink that hot brewed coffee while exchanging stories and snuggling up! Surely, this is the best cure for cabin fever.

I guess this bed weather is not that bad after all.

A Ten Minute Chat

On my way to meet my sister-in-law in Clark, I got an intriguing text message from a good friend, Inna, so I rushed to eTelecare to meet her.

I saw her from afar with a big grin. We hugged each other firmly and at an instant, we were just like crazy radio actors narrating all the highs and lows of our lives. Imagine us chatting about these topics which were flowing sporadically in averagely ten minutes.

-She shared about the current status of their employment.
-I ached for her work concern.
-She confessed how sad she felt for recently arguing with another colleague/friend.
-I assured her it won't stain their relationship.
-She declared how happy she is now as a married woman.
-I attested the truth of her statement.
-She told me about Naning's health status after a minor home accident. (Naning is Cleo's daughter.)
-I praised my friend Cleo for being a super mom.
-She broke the news that she's three days delayed!
-I was ecstatic and advised her to see her OB Gyne right away.
-She stressed that she'll take care of herself for her baby.
-I encouraged her to try thebump.com online for her baby planner.
-She reminded me of the time and my appointment with my sister-in-law.
-I squeezed her tightly and thanked her for a lovely chat.
-She beamed a wide smile and kissed me goodbye.

So I drove away with mixed emotions - wishing I could stretch the time.

my priceless blessing

Gilbert and I are seriously, annoyingly affectionate with lots of everyday hugs, winks and kisses. Today marks the fourth year of our married life and it still feels like we've just met. I learn something new from him and about him each passing time. Well, he's definitely not a saint with his flaws but his generosity and honest love overshadow them. He's a matured, sensible man with a waggish humor.

Our life together is like climbing a tall mountain. Naturally there are many inherent difficulties on our way to the peak, but we stop once in a while to appreciate the miracles we receive each day. We try not to set our eyes on the steeps, stony or icy paths we ascend because seeing only those will make our climb useless.

We do have a long way to go but just being with him in this journey is one of my priceless blessings.

happy thoughts in 2008

I'm feeling more anxious today than I should be. As the new year approaches, I have decided to take big risks and major decisions in my life. I feel so low and my eyes are about to swell in tears. I know that I should not let this anxiety swallow me. Before I finally say good bye to 2008, I want to reminisce some of the joyous moments and blessings I received this year.

January - What a charmed way to start the year as my first niece was born - Joaquin Afridel Cay Roque. We call her Quintin or Prinsesita (Tagalog word for little princess).


February - I finally got my own ride - Bruce. It's a Honda esi 95 model and Gilbert bought it second hand from a good pal, Alek.


March - After several years of amortization, we got our Land Title for the lots Gilbert and I purchased in 2002. At the same month, my brother Ejae and pretty sister-in-law Princess officially pledged to love one another in the sacrament of Matrimony. Hooray!


April - It was my birthday! More to that, the whole family spent an adventurous summer in Subic Island Cove, Zoobic Safari).


May - Gilbert's high-spirited family visited us for a gathering in one of Pampanga's swimming resorts. We celebrated my dear mother-in-law's 64th birthday.


June - Luck is on our side as we celebrated a Holy Mass and met the Healing Priest, Among Fernando Suarez.


July - Gilbert's birthday! I also had a chance to file for a voluntary time-off from work.


August - It's detox time from our busy lives. We took a day off and spent an overnight stay at Hotel Vida (Managed by Fuego Hotels and Properties). I was offered a reasonable Junior Suite package from the visually stunning tavern. So our 08-08-08 story was all about our Hotel Vida experience - from the cozy ambiance to the great staff service.


September - Wanting a more inspiring activity, we trekked Pampanga and journeyed to the Seven Churches.

1. Sta. Monica Parish Church, Minalin
2. Metropolitan Cathedral of San Fernando
3. St. Augustine Parish Church, Lubao
4. Immaculate Concepcion Parish, Guagua
5. San Guillermo Parish Church, Bacolor
6. St James Parish Church, Betis
7. Holy Rosary Parish Church, Angeles City
October - Together with good friends, Helen and Roel, we invaded Tagaytay City and Enchanted Kingdom for a weekend escapade.


November - With the help of our ever reliable carpenter, Kuya Bong, we had a temporary fence on our Holy Angel Village lot.


December - After ten long years of relationship, our close friends - Inna and Armand - finally tied the knot. It was a funny, romantic, coffee themed wedding.


Dwelling lovingly on each memory assures me that God has not given up on me. He was standing right next to me all throughout the year with His infinite love. To this day, I am surrounded with colleagues turned best friends, supportive families, and a loving better half.

I'll let this wonderful thought sink deep into my spirit.

Now I'm ready to welcome 2009.

my christmas wish

...is to be accepted for who I am and to be loved for who I can still become.

pulling up the stakes

One of the biggest decisions anyone could make is quitting their job. It isn't easy, believe me.

Later in the afternoon, I will formally tender my resignation as a Training Facilitator for eTelecare Clark Services. It was a decision that should have happened months ago. I kept on postponing it because I was too afraid to move out of my comfort zone.

my workstation (taken January 2007)

You see, I've been with the company since 1999. This is my first job and the place, my second home. I've spent almost a decade of laughter and trials with people I treasure. In fact, this is where I met the man of my dreams - we call it Love@AOL. (AOL is my original employer. It was acquired by eTelecare in October 2007.)

If there is one thing holding me back, that would be the wonderful relationships I have built both here and abroad. Some moved on with their lives outside the company. Others are still eager to climb the corporate ladder.

I have no plans to work in another call center but still, I want to resign tactfully as it is not wise to burn bridges. My work desk is free from clutter. I'm almost done disposing all paper documents, personal files and e-mail. I also coordinated with the Human Resource Department to confirm my benefit options. I want to leave my job with a clean slate, maintaining positive relationship with the company.

Am I afraid?
Yes, but what an irrational fear!

Am I ready?
It doesn't matter, does it? Ready or not, I've made up my mind.

Am I prepared not to get a regular paycheck?
I will be. Money isn't everything.

It is heartbreaking to say good bye but at the same time, I feel charged and elated to nourish my social and family life. I've contributed more than what was expected of me at work. It's time for me to move on.

Mumbai Tragedy

Reading the news today is disheartening.

Wave of terror attacked Mumbai's tourist, business, and financial district. Hostages were trapped inside Taj and Oberoi Hotels in Mumbai after police and gunmen exchanged fire. Casualty figures varied at this time but one thing is for sure - several innocent people were injured and killed.

photos from the internet

I unconsciously covered my mouth with my hand as I read the morning news. I have been to India in 2004, met a lot of good friends and stayed at an Oberoi Hotel in Bangalore. A CNN employee, Yasmin Wong, got a call from the Taj Hotel staff and was asked to turn her lights off, place a wet towel by her door, and never attempt to leave the room until further notice. I could imagine how horrible this experience could be.

Raging fire, explosions, black smoke, blood, panic and screams - Where has all the love gone?

Late in the evening, I saw mom and asked if she heard about the Mumbai terror. She nodded. I told her I was so frightened that this could also happen in our country. She inquired, "Why are you afraid of such thing? You should not fear anyone but the Lord."

I was dumbfounded. Mom was right. We can never predict what the future holds. It can be terrifying but come to think of it, I should know whom to trust. Our life is with the Lord, our only salvation.

Love and prayers
to all victims of the Mumbai tragedy.

Thanksgiving Awakening

It's almost Thanksgiving. Although it is not much anticipated in the Philippines, I understand it's a time to express gratitude to God for a common purpose - usually for one's material and spiritual wealth. Most Americans prepare for this holiday with festive food and ambiance. There's obviously more to this holiday than feasting. Reflecting on what I have to be thankful for, I came to realize...

My career is not my only life. - Here's the math. I spend nearly 12 hours a day at work, 6-7 hours of sleep and only 4-5 hours for my husband/family/friends and spiritual moment. The smallest portion of my time is spent with the most important people in my life. This has been the case since 2005, after I got my promotion as a trainer. Don't get me wrong, I'm VERY thankful for my career but clearly, I can't keep it like this. Not now, not anymore.

The Lord's timing is always right and I don't need to be anxious. - There's a time for everything - cooking an elaborate meal, pressing on the car's brake pedal, hitting a shuttlecock or simply cracking a good joke. I am delighted with the Lord's flawless timing and I shall be eternally thankful for His presence in my life. Casting all my fears upon the Lord, I proclaim that He will provide what is best for me and Gilbert, in His time. Why should I worry when lilies of the field and the birds of the sky are cared for? How much more will our Heavenly Father take care of us? We have confidence in the Lord and we believe that He will grant us our little angel with His perfect love, in His perfect time.

The people I love can also hurt me. - I cherish friends and relationships. But I can't hide the fact that I'm stricken and wounded when people don't love me the way I love them. A close confidant is acting quite weird lately and a relative is showing insensibility and meanness. They're not the usual selfless, considerate, thoughtful people. It hurts me that they're indifferent but I try HARD to see the goodness in their hearts. Maybe, just maybe - they're passing through some personal struggles and I should not allow negativity to steal my peace and joy.

This Thanksgiving, I'll further examine my priorities, ask God's help in discerning what decisions to make and most certainly use these realizations to be a better me.

a boxing event

When I saw my brothers watching a boxing event with much rapt and intent yesterday, gladness filled my heart. I can vividly remember their growing up years - mimicking boxers, committing mayhem around the house with their energy, exuberance, and ardor not simmering down.

They grew up together yet their qualities are entirely distinctive. One is laid back and lighthearted and the other is a systematic leader, full of conviction. They have one thing in common though - their sense of humor (I think it runs through our veins). Evening dinner and chit chats won't be complete without their comic antics tickling every member of the family.

Now that they're both of age, I pray to the Lord that they remain generous, loving and happy. May they counterpunch life's trials, throwing a series of uppercuts at problems, just like a professional, disciplined boxer who is utterly undefeated by a unanimous decision.

Deep in my heart, I know they were raised to be responsible and courageous. If their opponent gets aggressive and throws a jab at them, there's no doubt that they can block or slip past them and respond with an inside power punch.

They are in-charge of their own lives but I'll still be here to love them - unfailingly.

more about my phone...

What cracks me up is that my dad, brothers and sisters are now wondering what I'll do with AiAi. My phone may be six year old but it really has a very few scratches and works perfectly well. They're hammering out a deal among themselves who gets to keep it.

I guess, they were encouraging me to upgrade to a newer phone all along because each one has a hidden desire for my Nokia 6310i.

Confessions of an addict

I am an addict.

I am addicted to love.

This should be the reason I've developed an insatiable "thirst" for Edward and Bella's story. I must admit. I am yet another victim of the novel Twilight (by Stephenie Meyer).

This is not your ordinary horrifying, gory vampire novel. The plot has a unique light than the blood-sucking horror they were in the past. No black coffins, no bats, no cob webs, nor freaky hairstyles. It is indeed a spellbinding romance and suspense which “will stay with you long after you have turned the last page.”

I can so identify with Bella’s insecurities, clumsiness, and her irrevocable passion for love. And Edward, He’s definitely one H.O.T. vampire. I like how Meyer described his constant struggle against the primal pull of Bella’s scent. He resisted every urge although the answer was evident - change her - he couldn't damn her soul.

Gilbert got me a LIT file (original Bella’s perspective) and I got another PDF file (Edward’s perspective) from a friend. So I've buried myself in the novel four times in the last five days - on my personal computer, my mom’s computer, my office computer, my sister’s laptop, or my hubby’s PSP.

With every single chance, I go back to the last page I’ve read and satisfy my addiction.

Still can't get enough of Edward and Bella.

I was begging for more.

I don’t think I’m ready to read Meyer’s second novel, New Moon. I want to linger on this moment for quite some time. Reading it was like a breath of fresh romantic air, leaving me with a shivery, thrilling feeling after.

I’m like floating on my natural high.

What I've done so far...

"Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom." - Laozi, Chinese mystic philosopher

Surfing the net today, I came across a compilation of fun, naughty, serious and inspirational things that any person could have done in their life. What a cunning way to know yourself better.

Mine are highlighted in red. Justified some of my revelations.

1. Flown a kite
2. Fallen asleep at work
3. Made a complete and utter fool of myself
4. Cheated while playing a game (adding spice to the game)
5. Attended at least one major sporting event
6. Felt an earthquake (it was terrible)
7. Been pushed into a pool/lake with all your clothes on
8. Skinny-dipped at midnight
9. Sent a message in a bottle
10. Touched a snake (life is short, touch a snake! make sure it's in a cage though)
11. Slept beneath the stars
12. Told someone the story of your life, sparing no details
13. Won a contest (no cheating this time)
14. Made love on a forest floor
15. Wrote a fan letter to your favorite celebrity (Shannen Doherty of BH 90210)
16. Hugged a tree
17. Lost over 20 pounds
18. Helped a stranger
19. Built your own PC from parts
20. Talked on the phone for more than 6 hours straight
21. Showered in a waterfall
22. Asked for a raise (I need a raise Dad!)
23. Sang a great song in front of an audience (well, it was great for me)
24. Used a fake ID
25. Spent a whole day reading a great novel (Twilight!!!!)
26. Learned to bartend
27. Not taken a shower for three days (after a major surgery, i just couldn't)
28. Fired a pistol, shotgun or rifle (Gilbert is a gun enthusiast)
29. Had more than 30 pairs of shoes at a time
30. Wrote your name on a public place (good old high school days)
31. Got up in a hot-air balloon
32. Collected stamps
33. Slept naked
34. Had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back (sob)
35. Been arrested
36. Slapped a person (he deserve it!)
37. Gone on a blind date
38. Had a threesome
39. Asked forgiveness from an enemy (It was hard but it felt good)
40. Farted in a crowded space (I'm human!)
41. Witnessed a crime
42. Been to a strip club
43. Met someone from the Internet in person
44. Made cookies from scratch (and cakes too!)
45. Gone backstage at a concert
46. Lain outside in the grass and watched cloud shapes go by
47. Spent a holiday alone
48. Been suspended from school
49. Had braces
50. Felt like an outcast
51. Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
52. Had major surgery
53. Totaled a car (not much, thank God!)
54. Donated cash to an orphan shelter
55. Paid for a meal with only coins
56. Been to the opposite side of the world
57. Learned to Tango
58. Mentored someone at work
59. Cried yourself to sleep
60. Swum in the ocean
61. Created your Family Tree
62. Thrown up in a bar
63. Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t
64. Made prank phone calls
65. Fed a homeless man
66. Survived an accident that you shouldn't have survived
67. Cut down on clutter (once a month, at least)
68. Gone bungee jumping
69. Screamed in public
70. Had a one night stand
71. Kissed a mirror (applied lipstick - curious how my lips looked like)
72. Gotten your fingers stuck together with super glue
73. Volunteered at a home shelter
74. Shoplifted
75. Had a crush on a teacher
76. Pretended to be a superhero (i'm a wonder woman fanatic)
77. Played a guitar or piano
78. Been kissed under the mistletoe
79. Saved another person's life
80. Crashed a party
81. Seen a tornado
82. Wrote an article for a newspaper (The Voice - our town's local newspaper)
83. Drove a race car
84. Cooked a gourmet meal
85. Winked at a cute stranger
86. Hosted a big event at work
87. Been a cheerleader
88. Lied about your real age

Wow, my life's not that plain after all.

day one

My husband laughed to the highest heavens and called me a late bloomer when I told him I’m ready to start my blogging career. I kept a diary as a child and writing has always been my first love.

The last few years have been a shuffle of radical life events and I can't seem to catch my breath – getting a promotion, marrying my best friend, moving to an apartment as our new home, trying to conceive, losing a dear aunt, opening a water station business, transitioning to a new company. All of which require me enormous mental, spiritual and physical strength. Despite the hectic days and never ending demands, I know something is missing.

I was thinking that if I could start writing again, it would give me time to relax, express myself and connect with the real world. Hoping that this would help me focus on what truly matters to me. I want to appreciate love and treasure life.

I missed so many chances of making myself a better person, countless opportunities to show people I care about how I truly feel and moments that I could have shared my success to people dear to me.

Starting today, I’ll do what I love to do. I’ll do the things I always wanted to do and I’ll do the things that I thought I could never do.

So roll up your sleeves, brace yourselves and get ready as I venture the up’s and down’s of my life and my metanoia.